Didn’t regret it, not for a second

by Anika (Illinois)

I had an abortion after I found out I was pregnant by a boyfriend. My feelings for him were waning and I was about to break up with him. I’d been sick for a while, everything was making me sick and I was so tired and my breasts were killing me… but as I was expecting my period and I was under the weather with stomach flu, I figured this was normal. So, I didn’t actually go to take the test until my period was about a week late.

Finding out I was pregnant was the worst moment of my life, as I was not willing or prepared to take on the responsibility of another life. So, I immediately made the appointment at a local clinic. My boyfriend was pretty MIA after I told him my plans, and even though he seemed to take partial responsibility, he has yet to really be any kind of support. He ended up not going with me as he was ‘busy’ and so I asked my close friend to go with me the next day for the actual procedure.

I waited there, and was checked for height and weight, blood type and after waiting for hours, finally was told to change into a gown. When I walked into the room, I had to say my full name and what I was doing there. Once that was done, I was told to sit on the bed, put my feet in the stirrups and lay back. Then, I got a twilight anesthetic via IV and that was it. I don’t remember much else before I fell asleep except asking if I’d remember the procedure, to which the nurse said no. Everyone was kind, but when I came to, I really wanted to see a friendly face, a face of someone I knew and I didn’t. So I cried. I didn’t stay in recovery long, I just drank the diet sprite and went to the bathroom like they asked, then I changed and left out to find my friend. When I did, I cried a lot, simply because I was happy to see her.

People thought I regretted what I did, but I don’t… not for a second.

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